Cloud Nine.

There's a song titled, "Last Day of Your Life" that I am in love with. It basically asks the questions we should all be asking ourselves. If this was your very last day on planet earth, what would you be doing? Would you want to be doing what you did yesterday...or even last week? My answer used to be "no" and that is part of the reason why I changed the direction of my life. How we spend our days is how we spend our lives, and I want to be spending each and every day with my favorite children making sure that I am living a life of purpose. 

When people ask me what I actually do every day...it's a hard question to answer. Every day is incredibly similar but so very different. We may eat breakfast, lunch and dinner at the same time, help with homework, clean dishes, go to the park and have dirty feet at the end of the day...but what happens in between those times is what really matters. Here's a little look in between the routine :]

It's a brand new day. I wake up and head down stairs greeted by all the children waiting on the couches and chairs. Some children give hugs and kisses, while others yell my name as I walk by. Our doorbell rings at least 100 times a day, from staff to visitors so I am usually the once to answer it. Nurses, staff, Mamitas and others arrive by 7:00 to begin their day. Breakfast is initiated by the doctor yelling..."vamos desayuno!" I love passing out the cheese for all of the kids, because the kids love to say their please and thank you's in english. 

After breakfast I usually wait on the couches in the first room of the house to ask kids who they're going to Lima with and play with some of the little ones. This has to be one of my favorite parts of the day. So much is going on around me, but I am sitting still talking and playing with children. QT (quality time), as Leah would say, is one of the most important parts of being a volunteer. Each child deserves some individual attention, whether it's just the walk home from Mass or swinging on the swings in the park. Baby hour comes and goes which usually means a baby has fallen asleep in my arms. Maybe it's just me, but there is no better feeling than having a baby fall asleep in your arms. Kiarita and Jean Pierre fall asleep like clock work at 10:30 which is when I sit down and feel the South American breeze on my face. 

The children have summer vacation now so trips to the park are daily. A group of kids (usually 6-12 kids) head to the park to play. Volleyball, soccer, wheelchair races, sliding, running, jump rope, bubbles and sidewalk chalk are park regulars. My first day back, I sat in the dirt with Lizbeth and we threw grass at each other for almost an hour. She fell asleep on my stomach as we were watching the clouds drift by and listening to John Mayer. It was one of the most peaceful moments of my life. Definitely on cloud nine :] 

I usually fall asleep on the couch with some child once we return from the park and am awoken for our second baby time of the day. Baby hour, coffee and serving dinner are next on the routine. After dinner the Doctor heads out to Mass and the children have English classes. You would be surprised how much everyone loves learning english, always completing their homework and are excited to tell the Doctor, "sweet dreams" in English. After the volunteers eat dinner with the Doctor, it's pure bliss. I usually end the day with a one on one conversation with a child and tell all of the kids good night before heading to bed. 

By the end of the day, I have washed over 300 dishes, ran up and down the stairs at least 40 times, given and received 100 kisses, had my name called every 10 minutes, tripped countless times, wiped tears and snot, my shirt is covered in dirt, my feet are black, I've met at least 5 new people, comforted a child during therapy, my stomach hurts from laughing so hard and a permanent smile is on my face. It is the perfect day and it happens every day. This is how I spend my days and this is how I want to spend my life :] 

So when most ask what do I actually do all day, the answer is simple. I LOVE. I start the day with my arms opens wide open ready to approach every situation and child with as much love as God has given me. I've never been happier as I am with these incredible children, living in Peru. So if you asked me, what I would do if today was my last day? I would be here. Loving, leading and living what my heart has called me to do. 

WITH ALL MY LOVE! 

-teaner 

Back to Peru! :]

Sitting in the Miami airport with a 10 hour layover definitely has its perks. Reading, writing and catching up on my favorite television shows are just a few of the things I have been doing...not to mention I'm in Miami trick ;] hahahaha

It seems like I have been waiting for today, January 16th, since I arrived back in America on December 8th. I have gotten so much grief about wanting to return early, my "depressing" last blog post and my comments of being unable to relate to my best friends didn't go over too well. So right now, I am not going to mention any of that. Those closest to me have heard it too many times and frankly, I am sick of saying it. So, this post will not relate to any of the above mentioned items. 

Go ahead and make fun of me all you want, but I have grown so much spiritually during my journey. I have always been a firm believer in God, but beyond that was something I never really understood or cared to explore. It's so hard to explain where I was spiritually last May (before I made the commitment to volunteer in Peru) and where I am now mid-January on my way back to a place I have fallen in love with. Preparing for my trip over the summer, I had the mindset that this was all about what I was doing and how these 9 months was an alternative to my sophomore year of college. It's incredible how 5 months have changed not only my spirituality but my entire life. I have always believed in fate...and that you can't fight it, no matter how hard try. And my journey is a clear example of pure, un-fightable fate. 

There's something that happened to me that most don't or will never understand. Until I actually felt it, I didn't quite believe it either. This could be the reason why I am so overjoyed to return to Peru (or maybe I'm just excited to squeeze Jean Pierre to pieces). I experienced a calling from God. Yeah, yeah, I know. If you don't care to continue reading...that's fine! I am just writing what I feel has happened to me within the last 5 months. There wasn't some biblical phenomenon where I was awoken from sleep. But, over time...I could just feel this pounding in my heart that was never there before. Something inside of me changed and I knew that I was in the right place, at the right time, doing what God had always planned for me. It's true fate that I went from attending Fordham University, discerning a new path at the end of my freshman year, getting on that plane in August to Peru and finding my passion weeks later. You truly can't fight fate :]

"We have been created for greater things. 

Not to just be a number in the world. Not just to go for diplomas and degrees. This work and that work. 

We have been created in order to love and to be loved."

-Mother Theresa

As much as I may not have seemed to enjoy being home, I really did love seeing my friends and family. I have some of the best supporters in the world and wouldn't trade them for anything (Yes, Lizzy and Ellen...that means YOU!) A long term volunteer once told me that there comes a point where I will need to choose between committing my life to serving God and the poor and my friends and family back home. She explained how difficult it was for her living between two worlds and I would know the day when I had to make that choice. After going back to Ohio for one month, I completely disagree. Maybe that is true in most circumstances...but let me tell you something. I have the greatest friends in the entire world. I think I returned to Ohio with more friends than I left with and never, ever will I make that decision. Like all of my friends and family, I am constantly changing. I may be changing in different ways than them after making the commitment to live a life for God and others...but I will always be the same best friend, sister, daughter and future maid of honor ;] that I aways have been. Promise!

I will update everyone as soon as I arrive at the Hogar safely and am greeted Tuesday morning by the greatest children I have ever met in my life <3 I couldn't be more excited for this next part of my journey! As always, I am just livin' and lovin' life. 

I never thought this 6 inch mattress and rickity bunk bed would feel so good ;] I'M FINALLY HOME!

-Teaner :]

"we are all pencils in the hand of God writing love letters to the world....."